Okay love, it’s time to have a serious conversation about a topic I’ve been meaning to bring up for a while now.
It’s something I’ve been hearing about from clients for years. And lately, it’s something I’ve found myself struggling with too.
That something; loving your body.
Not when it’s smaller or thinner, but exactly as it is now.
Maybe life has been super stressful lately, or you’ve gone through some hormonal shifts. Maybe you’re on new medication, or maybe you’re like me and have recently had a baby… whatever the reason, the fact is your body has changed. And I know how hard, and maybe even weird, it can be to see yourself in this new, changed body. It takes some getting used to, I get it.
But once you’ve finished processing the new-ness, I need you to do something for me okay?
I want you to show that miracle machine of yours (AKA your body) some serious love.
Because even though its appearance has changed, it still woke you up this morning and it still works hard to keep you alive, every second of every day.
When those voices start chattering about all the ways you wish you could change your body, take a breath and remember this; you and your body deserve love and appreciation at every size & shape, not just when it’s a size small.
But easier said than done right? That’s why today, I want to tell you about a few ways you can put the practice of body love into action regularly. Because, seriously beautiful, it’s time to stop holding yourself back from opportunities and from life, and step into the magnificence of your power.
First Step: Thank her
Your body that is.
Remember, ‘what you resist persists’ – so all of the nit picking & negative self talk going on about your body is only going to continue the vicious cycle of unhappiness. When was the last time you noticed something good about your body? Did you stop and acknowledge that moment? Did you spend as much time complimenting your body in that moment as you do when you’re criticizing it?
Gratitude is so powerful. The more time you spend in gratitude to your body, the less time you have to focus on what you’d like to change about it. Just like in any relationship, your body needs to feel that you truly love and appreciate her.
Truth is, most of us neglect the relationship with our bodies, because we don’t prioritize it and let the busy-ness of our lives get in the way. Today’s your chance to reconnect and nurture your relationship with your body; so pick a time of day to stop and thank your body. Do this everyday and pay close attention to how your body responds.
Second Step: Spend time with her
Want to know what happens when you’re super focused on all the ways you want to change someone? You completely ignore who they are right now, in this moment. When you’re so wrapped up in how you want to look in the future or how you used to look in the past, you’re rejecting the person you are, and the body you’re in, today. If you don’t believe your body is worthy of love, in its current state, chances are you’ll feel the same way even after you’ve changed it.
Don’t get me wrong, there’s nothing wrong with having fitness goals or wanting to make some changes to your look, that’s how we show growth and evolution as individuals. But your current mental and emotional state will determine how healthy you make these changes.
So, instead of avoiding the body that carries you, what if you got to know her a little (or a lot) better. Why not spend time getting to know who you really are? Think about what matters most to you in your life right now.
What dreams do you currently have? How about music, what kind of music do you listen to and what kind of books do you read? What do you like to do in your spare time? When was the last time you smiled or laughed? What gives you pleasure and when was the last time you did this thing? What was the last thing you did to take care of your body and have you done it recently? When was the last time you felt worthy and how can you feel this way more often?
Write the answers down in a journal and read them to yourself over & over. Have your answers changed much from say, 5 or 10 years ago? Do any of your answers surprise you? Do any of your answers impress you? Study the things that make you happy and cared for and try to incorporate them into your life as much as possible!
Third Step: Study Her
Now that you’ve shown her love and gotten to know her better, it’s time to really look at and SEE her. It’s impossible to show your body love, if you avoid looking at her.
Stand in front of a full length mirror (preferably nude) and take a good hard look at this miracle… WITHOUT judgment.
Observe the strength of your legs and spine how they hold you up. Take in every curve and crevice, and the placement of each. Memorize every slant and slope… because in the 7(+) billion people that exist on this planet, there is no other person who has the exact body you have. How incredible is that?? Knowing & memorizing the details that make your body different is exactly what will make your style authentic and interesting.
And if you haven’t already done so, be sure to find out your body shape by entering your measurements into my body shape calculator here.
Once you’ve studied your body, it’s time to study what inspires you. Create a style Pinterest board and round up any image that inspires you in some way. It can be a color, a particular fabric or an entire outfit. Whatever it is, be sure you write out why you’re drawn to that image in the description box. Take a about a week to do this. When you’ve finished, you’ll be able to visually see the things that inspire you and ultimately know what to look for when choosing garments from your closet or a store.
Then, finally, schedule a 2-3 hour window to play in your closet and experiment creating outfits. Giving yourself this scheduled time off to let your creative juices flow (with out the time crunch) will be a total game-changer, trust me!
Unfortunately for many of us, criticizing our body becomes an easy and regular thing to do. Which is why I really want you to come back to these 3 steps, the next time you find yourself stuck in the constant negative mind chatter over your body.
Please know that you and your body deserve to look and feel beautiful exactly as you are now. So please, stop holding on to clothes that are too small for you, and stop waiting to dress better or go shopping for a body that doesn’t currently exist! Being happy and comfortable with your body starts with you loving you, exactly as you are right now. And here what’s amazing about this; once you make this internal shift, your body eventually starts to respond externally… now isn’t that just sweet icing on an already healthy delicious cake!
So tell me gorgeous, how will you be showing your body some love today??